How to talk to kids about money is something that's been on my mind a lot lately, too. Max is very aware that we don't have much money - to the extent that he'll say things like, "Oh, my mummy and daddy won't buy me that, they don't have any money," to people, which can occasionally be mortifying. (Like the time we were walking away from a local tourist spot and he stopped a woman who was on the way in and said, "You have to pay to get in there, and my mummy and daddy wouldn't because they're not rich, you know.") I do think we have to be honest with him, particularly as we're both self-employed, so we often have to have conversations about the importance of us having time to work, but I also worry that he's growing up with a preoccupation with how much things cost, and will sometimes voice concern about how we're going to afford certain things. So, food for thought, as always!
Thank you! He sounds adorable. But, yes, it’s a hard balance, I think. I try to make sure I’m not saying no to things that don’t cost much - like the cinema with Harry or gym with Joe - but I’ve had to cancel trips this year and even tho they claim not to mind, it doesn’t feel great.
I’m way too honest about money with my kids but that’s because I’m too honest about everything. I’ve never been good at age appropriate ‘need to know basis’ summaries. My parents were much better at that than I was. I got the gist of money and its limitations as a kid but my parents never passed money stress on to me. I knew that they lived in the red all the time (my mum once commented as a throwaway remark that they hadn’t been in the black since 1979) but they never showed anxiety about that, so I didn’t feel anxious about money.
I need to work on simplifying how I talk about everything with my kids so that I don’t pass my anxieties on to them, and money is definitely a part of that.
I have the overexplaining problem too. Also I’ve started asking them to recap what I’ve just told them because often they pick out random bits that don’t actually make sense 😬.
I think you’re right tho, that not showing anxiety probably helps, no matter what the actual situation is - my two have certainly never seen me crying about money.
Oh gosh, I worry about the impact I’m having on my children about money. My children will sometimes ask for something and then quickly say ‘but I can wait until payday’ or ‘do we have enough money for X?’ This knocks me for six sometimes and I really wish I didn’t have to say ‘yes you can have this, but on pay day’. I would really love to know how to talk to my children about money in a way that won’t do harm 😅
Yes, same here. Sometimes “I know we probably can’t afford it, but…”
I will try to find someone to talk to about it (for the newsletter). I did contact someone but I think she decided I don’t have enough subscribers. Rude 😂
That would be so helpful if you could! Oh 😅 good luck with the search! I hope you can find someone willing to share their perspective because it is such a tough subject to know whether or not you're doing the right thing.
I don't want to spoil my children, and I also don't want them to think that we're poor, and end up giving them all sorts of money worries and anxieties. All I'm trying to do is explain that they have to work for something, they can't just have what they want, when they want (as this was me when I realised I didn't have to wait via credit cards, loans and finance! 🙃).
I always believe in being honest with kids but I’m realizing how I convey this honesty really matters. Also, recognizing so many fails so I’m also trying to give myself and others more grace.
Thanks so much for having me Keris!
How to talk to kids about money is something that's been on my mind a lot lately, too. Max is very aware that we don't have much money - to the extent that he'll say things like, "Oh, my mummy and daddy won't buy me that, they don't have any money," to people, which can occasionally be mortifying. (Like the time we were walking away from a local tourist spot and he stopped a woman who was on the way in and said, "You have to pay to get in there, and my mummy and daddy wouldn't because they're not rich, you know.") I do think we have to be honest with him, particularly as we're both self-employed, so we often have to have conversations about the importance of us having time to work, but I also worry that he's growing up with a preoccupation with how much things cost, and will sometimes voice concern about how we're going to afford certain things. So, food for thought, as always!
Thank you! He sounds adorable. But, yes, it’s a hard balance, I think. I try to make sure I’m not saying no to things that don’t cost much - like the cinema with Harry or gym with Joe - but I’ve had to cancel trips this year and even tho they claim not to mind, it doesn’t feel great.
I’m way too honest about money with my kids but that’s because I’m too honest about everything. I’ve never been good at age appropriate ‘need to know basis’ summaries. My parents were much better at that than I was. I got the gist of money and its limitations as a kid but my parents never passed money stress on to me. I knew that they lived in the red all the time (my mum once commented as a throwaway remark that they hadn’t been in the black since 1979) but they never showed anxiety about that, so I didn’t feel anxious about money.
I need to work on simplifying how I talk about everything with my kids so that I don’t pass my anxieties on to them, and money is definitely a part of that.
I have the overexplaining problem too. Also I’ve started asking them to recap what I’ve just told them because often they pick out random bits that don’t actually make sense 😬.
I think you’re right tho, that not showing anxiety probably helps, no matter what the actual situation is - my two have certainly never seen me crying about money.
Thanks so much for featuring my Money essay 🫶
You’re so welcome. I loved it.
Oh gosh, I worry about the impact I’m having on my children about money. My children will sometimes ask for something and then quickly say ‘but I can wait until payday’ or ‘do we have enough money for X?’ This knocks me for six sometimes and I really wish I didn’t have to say ‘yes you can have this, but on pay day’. I would really love to know how to talk to my children about money in a way that won’t do harm 😅
Yes, same here. Sometimes “I know we probably can’t afford it, but…”
I will try to find someone to talk to about it (for the newsletter). I did contact someone but I think she decided I don’t have enough subscribers. Rude 😂
That would be so helpful if you could! Oh 😅 good luck with the search! I hope you can find someone willing to share their perspective because it is such a tough subject to know whether or not you're doing the right thing.
I don't want to spoil my children, and I also don't want them to think that we're poor, and end up giving them all sorts of money worries and anxieties. All I'm trying to do is explain that they have to work for something, they can't just have what they want, when they want (as this was me when I realised I didn't have to wait via credit cards, loans and finance! 🙃).
Also I haven’t forgotten your interview! It fell off the bottom of drafts, which I did not know was a thing!
No problem at all! Oh gosh, I didn't know that was a thing either, thanks for letting me know 😬
I always believe in being honest with kids but I’m realizing how I convey this honesty really matters. Also, recognizing so many fails so I’m also trying to give myself and others more grace.