"Money is power, and we are not supposed to have our own power."
Authors & Money
Authors & Money is a short series of interviews with authors, inspired by author Lindsay Galvin.
I’ll be posting as usual on Mondays with an additional Thursday interview post until I run out of authors.
I had a friend to stay at the weekend and of course we talked about money. When I went to Paris a couple of months ago and my flight was cancelled and the next available flight wasn’t until 48 hours later, this friend told me I was entitled to compensation. This weekend she asked me if I’d got it. I had not. Because I hadn’t applied for it.
She was (kindly) annoyed. She’d checked the terms and conditions of my flight and knew I was entitled to it. So why hadn’t I applied? Well… because I could have just gone home, I told her. I don’t live that far away. Doesn’t matter, she said, you’re entitled to it. And also they put me up in a hotel, I said, I wasn’t expecting that. (Of course, the next flight wasn’t for two days and they only offered one night so I had to pay for the other night myself. And I didn’t have to! I could have just gone home!) Doesn’t matter, she said, the flight was cancelled! You’re entitled to compensation! Apply for it!
So I did. It took five minutes. Don’t know if I’ll get it yet, but I’m glad I applied. But why hadn’t I in the first place? It’s that thing again. It’s sort of not feeling worthy? Not wanting to be a bother? A sort of British oh dear, never mind? I don’t know. But in future I’m going to try to channel my friend and stand up for my rights.
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An interview with Lani Diane Rich
Lani Diane Rich is a New York Times bestselling author, a story expert, and an award-winning podcaster. She has published 12 novels with Hachette, St. Martin's Press, and Penguin. Her latest book is How Story Works, an elegant guide to the craft of storytelling.
Why do you think women are often reluctant to talk about money?
Wow, this is so complicated. Let me start by saying I can only speak to why straight white women in Western/American culture don’t speak about money, because I don’t think people who are born and raised outside the systems of white supremacy and patriarchy are trained to uphold those systems in quite the same way. So when I say “we,” I mean… straight, white, American/Western women.
Anyway, the simplified reason is this: Money is power, and we are not supposed to have our own power.
The more complicated answer is that we are trained from birth to access our power and personal value through white men, who gain their power through systems of white supremacy and patriarchy, which are basically two heads on one hellhound that will maim us if we don’t stay in line. We are also raised to keep each other in line with what the hellhound demands through shame and ostracization.
Anyway, the ideal straight white woman is docile, beautiful, quiet, appropriate, sweet, and self-sacrificing. She has big boobs, a small waist, and is bad with math. This is not an accident. We are trained from jump to chase this ideal… which is impossible to achieve… and spend all our resources of energy and self-worth in its endless, exhausting pursuit. Again, this is by design; if we’re well-nourished, well-rested, self-interested enough to earn our own money and smart enough to work a calculator, we won’t need a man. Some of us may decide we want one, but he has to be an equally contributing partner and not controlling us by deciding if and when we get our money/power.
The patriarchy was designed to control us; not work alongside us. And this is also why these systems are deeply invested in heteronormativity; two men together have too much consolidated power, two women together aren’t under anyone’s direct control. People whose gender identity crosses lines in a power structure that feeds off of gender identity are a threat to these traditional systems of power.
No one really cares who anyone has sex with.
It’s about power. It’s always about power.
So, anyway… money is power, and we are not supposed to have our own power. Think about it; the only women I’m aware of who show off their nice houses and cars and jewelry are the Real Housewives of Various Municipalities… because they received their wealth in the hellhound-approved way—through men. A single straight white women with her own money and power is demure about it, because if she's not, her friends will eat her.
This makes me sound like I hate white women. I don’t hate white women. I like myself quite a lot, and some of my best friends are white women. But we were programmed from birth to protect harmful systems. We need to show our love for each other by deprogramming each other.
Anyway. I am sure you excited for/dreading my next answer, so hit me!
What is your relationship with money currently?
I am 51 years old, and I am just now, finally, in control of my own money. I am completely debt-free and living a modest life so that I can live on a modest income without working myself to death. I hope that I will soon be able to have extra money to put away at the end of every month, but I just made the switch from full-time employment to full-time self-employment a few months ago, so for the moment, I’m just feeling really good about being off that treadmill.
Can you talk a bit about how and why you made that switch?
I’ve actually been self-employed for most of my adult life, and I like it. I went back to work because my ex also destroyed my business when he left, so I had to make sure that I could pay for my home and keep my kids in Cheezits.
I’ll admit; I really enjoyed having enough money for those five years, but I found over time that I just spent money without thinking about it—which was nice—but most of the stuff I bought I didn’t really need or use.
In selling my house and cashing out my 401k, I gave myself some runway to supplement what I’m making being self-employed, which is about half of what I need. But my monthly budget is now less than half of what it was when I was working. Even though I was making more money, my expenses were through the roof as well.
I don’t feel any real difference in my quality of life, except that I think more deeply before purchasing something, and I use everything I have until it disintegrates.
The decision to quit and dedicate myself full-time came down to the fact that absolutely every indicator was pointing to this choice. The place where I was working got a new leader who was appallingly bad. I finally wrote and published my book, “How Story Works,” which was the cumulation of 20 years of study and expertise. And, more than anything, I wanted to write novels again.
How did traditional publishing work out for you financially? Is there anything you think publishers should do differently to help authors with the money side of things?
Traditional publishing does not work for most authors financially. You give a publisher a year or so of your work, they take it, throw it against the wall for six weeks, and if it doesn’t fly out the doors in that time, that’s it.
The average author gets a paltry advance and like 8% of the cover price, 10-15% of which goes to your agent. Typically, writers that aren’t already blockbuster successes also have to do most of their own marketing, and most publishers aren’t signing unknown authors without an established platform anymore. You can get your rights back usually after some years, but honestly… traditional publishing is heavily weighted on the side of the publisher.
That said, there are wonderful things about traditional publishing. For one, you get an amazing editor who truly loves you and your work; I have had the great luck to work with some of the best editors in the business and I miss them every day. Also, you get to see your book on store shelves. That’s a wild experience, and I’m very grateful I got to have it.
But in the end, it’s just not really worth it. I’m very excited about self-publishing, and very wary of traditional publishers. There are some special circumstances under which I would sign with a traditional publisher, but beyond those exceptions, I’d choose self-publishing every day and twice on Sundays.
What publishers can do to help their authors is never pay less than a year’s living wage when they sign a book. At this rate, that should be $50k. $50k should be the least anyone makes at any job for a year of work; I don’t care if it’s the drive-through at McDonald’s, these large corporations can afford that easily.
That’s not how capitalism works, and I get it. But now that authors can produce their own books (although, writers, please hire a good editor, that’s the one thing you really need) there just isn’t as much reason to publish traditionally as there used to be.
What’s the biggest money mistake you’ve made?
Honestly? Marrying a sociopath and putting him in charge of my money. Took me five brutal years of working full-time while running a media company on the side, and it almost killed me, but I paid off every penny of debt he left me with, which was in the tens of thousands. No one else will ever be in charge of my money ever again.
What’s the best thing you’ve ever spent money on?
Moving to Colorado. I basically had to chew my arm off to get out of that old house, but I went from a 2,000 square foot house to an 850 square foot apartment, and I have never been happier about a decision in my life. It ate up a chunk of my profit from the sale, but I no longer live in the place where my children and I were abused, and it was worth every penny. And living in a smaller place means I can keep it clean and it makes me so happy. All the stuff I had was just weighing me down, and I didn’t need it.
Do you have a retirement fund? If not, do you have a plan?
Oh, no. Brace yourself.
Retirement, as it’s designed in America, is a scam. I mean… come on. You’re supposed to kill yourself working for a company that does not care about you, refuses to pay you a living wage and will lay you off in a heartbeat with no income and no healthcare. You’re supposed to take what excess you can squeeze out of a month and put it into a stock market that will likely crash and leave you with nothing.
Then, if you are one of the rare people makes it to retirement without losing everything, you can’t do that until you’re at least 70 years old, because your stock market increases were outpaced by inflation. If you do make it to retirement without being killed by a system that sees you as a money pump, our “health care system”—which is not a health care system at all, it’s a your-money-or-you-can-just-die system—will take the rest.
I am my retirement plan. I don’t want to stop working, I just want to stop working myself to death so people who don’t work at all can buy another yacht, while I make just enough to keep the treadmill moving. Now, I’m working how I want, when I want, and taking my retirement days in bits and pieces throughout the year. Eventually, I’ll be able to save up for when I want to work less, but I don’t think I’ll ever stop working entirely. I like my work, and I think meaningful work is one of the most joyful things about being human. I will not give it up.
What would you do with $10,000?
I’d put it away until I start making a profit every month. Then, I’d go to Europe.
